Marked
by ASliverOfHope
Summary: Roderich and Gilbert live in a world where everyone has a soulmate, one they are destined to be with. Each person is born with a mark on their chest and the person with the matching mark is their soulmate. Gilbert is too immature for the relationship at first and Roderich is still in love with someone else. Pruaus, Human AU, Soulmate AU, Human names used


It was said that everyone had a perfect match. When someone found that one person, who's mark matched their own, the pair was destined to be together. Forever as soulmates. Roderich, being the realist he was, was not too sure he believed in that. He absently rubbed the silky fabric over his heart where his own mark lied. He'd been taught and told from a young age, as all in society were taught, that the day he would meet his soulmate, his mark would change. From his parents, he'd heard that he would feel warmth spread across his chest and the mark would turn from a pale brown, like the color of a freckle, to a deep crimson. The mark was only an indicator that one's soulmate was near by, it was up to that person if they wanted to take action to meet their fated person.

Roderich wasn't sure he wanted to meet his "soulmate" nor was he sure what would happen if he did. There was way too much at stake with meeting this one person. What if he met his soulmate and it didn't work out? Sure, he'd heard even fate couldn't be perfect, but it was destined to workout anyway. What if he and his soulmate despised each other? What if he never found his other perfect half? Even if he did, what if he couldn't make it work? What if he was the exception to the fate of soulmates? There was just too much stress, too much pressure. If it didn't work out with his soulmate, would there be another out there for him? Like, what if his soulmate died, would his mark fade and then he'd left alone for the rest of his life?

The brunette sometimes really hated how effortless the piano had become to him, because then his mind had time to dive into the bottomless ocean of the unknown. He slammed the piano lid shut before he banged his head onto the keys. He was jolted from his thoughts from the sudden ringing of his phone, he smiled as he saw Elizabeta calling. As he talked to her he thought how he was plenty happy with her. He was quite content in the life he was living. He loved his current girlfriend even if their marks didn't coincide. He knew she felt same as he did, and yet every time he was with her, he wondered if they were just buying time until they found the _one_. What if she found her _one_ and left him? Would he fall apart? He'd hate to admit to being that weak, but she'd been by his side, supporting, for as long as he remembered. He was often angry, although he never showed it to her, that she wasn't his soulmate. He just didn't understand fate, it would have made everything so much easier. Roderich often thought too much of what others thought of him and what they would say if they found out that his mark didn't match Elizabeta's.

He wasn't quite sure why he let his girlfriend talk him into going to the beach that day. He wasn't all that fond of swimming or the sun's harsh rays. Maybe it was because it would give him an excuse to get out and away from his nagging thoughts. Roderich absently watched as Elizabeta stripped off her dress, revealing a lime green bikini that brought out the green tones in her kind eyes. She was the most beautiful girl he'd ever laid eyes on, but he knew there was something missing. His eyes settled on the mark that was nestled into the left side of her chest. It's soft curls and dots were so unlike his own pattern of stripes and sharp peaks. Each mark spanned a diameter of four inches and it's design was a tribal like pattern that was unlike anyone else's. Well, except that of a person's match.

"Roderich? Do you want to come swimming with me?" Elizabeta asked, bending a bit at the waist to peer down at him.

He most certainly did not. No way would he take off his shirt and show his mark in public. "No, I'm alright. I don't really care for that sort of thing." He answered evenly.

She pouted a bit, "Okay then. I'll come back an join you in a bit." He watched her run off into the water with her a few of her friends. His violet eyes followed the shoreline as it inched up the sand and then was pulled back into the depths. The simple, automatic movements of the waves finally calmed him down and washed away his soulmate thoughts.

Yet, fate had other ideas, she had a way of sticking her nose where she was never wanted. It was like a sudden flame, bursting to life and Roderich's eyes widened in disbelief. The warmth and tingles crawled and overflowed on his left side. _No! _The brunette thought, _not now. I'm not ready yet. Please no. _His heart pounded as he apprehensively lifted the collar of his t-shirt. Sure enough, his mark was no longer a soft brown, but shone like a ruby. Panic set in, prickling over his skin, making the hair on his arms stand on end and he scanned the beach. His eyes suddenly locked onto the form of a young male about his age. The man has pale skin, soft white hair and red eyes full of life and joy. Just like the sun cutting through the clouds, this man's mark glared brilliant red on a white chest. That mark, it was the same one Roderich looked at in the mirror every morning. A perfect match. At that moment he felt suddenly cold, like he was in Antarctica instead of the steaming beach. Perfectly shaped nails clawed at his T-shirt, if he could he would have ripped his mark off of his chest. A male? He was completely horrified that his match turned out to be another man, but the furious beating wings in his stomach were more prominent. He was an upstanding proper man! He knew his panic and thinking were wrong and backwards for this world but he was still so upset. He didn't want another man! What would his parents think of him? His dreams of a beautiful bride with chestnut hair, not unlike Elizabeta's, shattered like glass. The brunette's heart stopped and he felt like he couldn't catch his breath no matter how many deep breaths he took. A joyful smile played on the albino man's lips as he shook the water out of his hair. Roderich couldn't help but watch as the man stretched his arm up to smooth down the hair on the back of his neck. Each one of the man's muscles in his arm contracted with the movement showing off an exquisitely toned form. The albino wasn't huge, but every muscle he did have, down to his six pack appeared as if they had been sculpted out marble by a master craftsman. In fact he was a bit short and stocky, although, taller than Roderich, who had always been petite for a man. He watched as the stranger stuck his surfboard into the sand. Roderich's amethyst eyes tracked the albino as one of his friends came over and pointed to his mark. No. Nothing in this world could make him take off his shirt now. Yet, he continued to watch the surprise on the man's face and he caught a bit of their conversation as they approached their towels, just three feet in front of his own.

"…not really. I don't know. I'm not really ready to meet my soulmate yet." Roderich's match replied.

So they were in the same boat.

"I'm still young, man. It's a soulmate; I can find him or her another time. I still have more I want to do before settling down. I am too awesome to be tied down right now."

"But your soulmate is _here_ on this beach! Don't you at least want to look? You know, find out what he or she looks like?" asked the brunette that sat at his side.

"Oui, Gil, I would want to know." His blond friend answered.

"That's because you've already met yours, Franny." The albino fired back

"So? I am very happy with Mattie. I couldn't want anyone else. It's kind of nice knowing everything worked out and I'm set for life."

"How can you know it's for life? What if I'm not like you? I'm not ready guys, lay off." The albino, Roderich now knew as Gil, lay back on his towel, showing no signs of continuing the conversation. Roderich sighed in relief, but he couldn't help feeling a little bit hurt by the rejection.

"Why wouldn't you be ready?" The brunette protested. "We wait our whole lives for our soulmates!"

Gil threw an arm over his eyes and groaned. "You know me, I'm still in the stage of dating desperate girls who haven't yet found their match."

Roderich grimaced and scoffed. Never in his life had he been so disgusted by another human being. Who had morals and standards that were that low? This guy was his soulmate? _No way_, the brunette shook his head. Fate had gotten this wrong; they were nothing alike. _If this is my soulmate I'll have to accept being alone. I'm never going to take of my shirt. I'll have to hide this as long as I can from Liz and stay happy with her as long as possible. _He cleared his throat and tried to calm down as much as possible. Unfortunately he couldn't possibly be as calm as he tried to be with the storm of emotions flooding him on the inside. Roderich started to feel nauseous the more he thought about it and he couldn't hide it as Elizabeta came back up to join him.

"Roderich, darling, you look unwell. Are you doing okay?"

The brunette cleared his throat again, "No, I don't think I am."

"Why don't we leave then? You should go home and lie down, I'll make you a cup of tea when we get there." She smiled down at him reassuringly as she packed up their things. He could see the worry behind her smile and he longed for his mark to change so it could match hers. Elizabeta was kind, she was supportive, loving and even if she was a little feisty and had a temper at times, they fit together perfectly in his opinion. After picking up their things, she slipped a supportive arm around his waist as they made their way to the car. He couldn't be more relieved, when he was setting in the car, that he managed to avoid the run in with his soulmate.

He lay in the dark trying to rest and calm his stomach, but the thoughts swirling around in his head only involved the certain albino that had become a new bane of his existence. Roderich couldn't forget those piercing red eyes and the curve of his abs, and how the light shone off his white hair, making it almost iridescent. He groaned and pulled the blanket over his head, _did I really just think about his abs and _iridescent _hair? Is this what attraction feels like, can fate force me into like my soulmate? _He scoffed, not believing that he actually though of fate like a real force. He seemed to be losing all rationality the more he thought about Gil. He knew sexual orientation or preference didn't really matter when it came to soulmates. His soulmate could be a man it could be a women. Two women were allowed to marry, two men were allowed to marry, but the only marriage that couldn't happen was a marriage between non-soulmates. That fact of this world was soulmates trumped all. In their society sexual orientation wasn't a thing, no person gay, no person was straight, not entirely anway. Although, if a male is born to be with another male in the end, it didn't really matter, that's just how it was.

"Roderich? I've brought your tea, are you up for it?" Elizabeta brought the tray into his room and set it on the bedside table.

Roderich removed his arm from over his eyes showing real vulnerability to her for the first time. "No, but please just stay here." He patted the bed and she carefully sat next him, running a hand over his hair. He sighed and closed his eyes only focusing on her touch to calm him down. His heart rate calmed and his head stopped spinning as she hummed softly to him. Roderich smiled as he recognized the melody; it was the song that he composed for her.

Closing his eyes, he remembered the day he preformed the song for her. Elizabeta's green eyes lit up in surprise when she saw her name written across the top in his own calligraphy. She closed her eyes and clasped her hands together by her heart as she listened. He heard her praise and clapping in his head again. Roderich fully calmed down but just as he did, Elizabeta's form next to his piano quickly morphed into Gil's pompous form. Violet eyes snapped open and he sat up suddenly, startling Elizabeta as he did.

"What's got you so upset?" Elizabeta peered at him curiously, "I've never seen you like this before."

"That's because I don't let anyone see me upset." He murmured finally admitting that to her. "I really must be sick. You should probably go."

She nodded and let herself out quietly.

The next few weeks went along normally and the couple fell into their normal routine. After his original break down, Roderich found it surprisingly easy to pretend he had never found his soulmate. They took their normal afternoon walk after tea, then he spent time at his piano composing and they made dinner together, laughing together as normal. It wasn't until Elizabeta decided to surprise Roderich for their three-year anniversary that everything went sour. She had let herself into his house, not knowing that he was in the middle of changing as she did so. The chocolates, his very favorite, fell to the carpet when she opened the door and saw the bright red mark across his chest. "Roderich!"

He jumped and quickly covered up his chest, amethyst eyes wide with shock. "E-Elizabeta, dear, you surprised me."

She walked into the room, anger overtaking her surprise. "Why didn't you tell me you found your soulmate?"

"I didn't. It was at the beach, he was near and I didn't go find him."

"Him?" She narrowed her eyes suspiciously, "you didn't find your soulmate and yet you know it's a _him_."

Roderich clasped his hand over his mouth, letting the middle of his shirt flop open. He removed his hand and ran it over his face. "Yes, I saw him."

"Then why are you still with me?" She asked, a little hurt.

"Because I despise him! I know that it's not supposed to happen but it did. He is a despicable person, nothing like me. There's no way it would ever work out."

She looked over his face worriedly and in surprise. "You don't like him? Aren't you supposed to fall for him when you see him? I don't get it."

"I don't either. Do you think fate is capable to mess up?" He asked timidly

"I don't think so, it's never been heard of. I think it's your choice to figure it out or not, but I can't stay with you now that I know. How long?"

"I saw him that day at the beach." He bit his lip. Everything he feared would happened started to happen. When he asked himself if he would fall apart if she left, well he didn't think that would actually be possible. Well, until now. "Can't we just stay together until you find yours?"

"Why? Why do you even want to be with me?" Her olive eyes welled up, knowing she wanted to stay but couldn't bring herself to stand in his way.

"I love you." He whispered, but even he knew it was not in the same way that he used to. Something was off, something was different, and it was all his soulmate's fault. "I like being with you. We're familiar and we fit together well."

Elizabeta smiled sadly, "I love you too, but you know as well as I do that this was going to end someday. I was disappointed that I wasn't your soulmate just as I assume you are. That just means he will fit better than we do now. Being with a soulmate isn't supposed to be easy, but you'll make it work. That's why you're soulmates!"

"What if I can't?"

"Then it was your choice to give up. I can't hold you back from your happy ending and your true love. I'm sorry." The both looked at each other and they knew it was over even if neither of them wanted to admit it right now. Fate had torn them apart now with her twister destroying everything in her path as she did so. If it wasn't meant to be there was not way it could be. Her eyes were always scanning, always looking, for the opportune time to enforce what she thought was best. She knew what was best and what time was best to bring that person into someone's life. She knew better than any mere mortal even if that mortal couldn't see why at the moment.

Roderich was about to really meet the man who would drive him completely mad and crazy. Yet that same man would bring out his true emotions and a love that he never could dream of experiencing. That same person would bring out his romantic and loving side that he never showed to anyone else. That person would complete him. No, it wouldn't be perfect, but it would better than that. It would gritty and mean sometimes. It would scare him more than any of his worst fears, but when everything was good, it would be more beautiful than a sunrise. He wouldn't believe that now and how could he with the opinion he had of his soulmate at this moment?

It was Elizabeta that finally spoke up, "So I know neither of us really want to end it, but I'll have to be the one who does. Happy anniversary, sorry it had to be today." She gathered her things and left quietly.

* * *

><p>It had been over two years since the day his mark flared up and two years since he last felt the warmth. He stared down at his coffee, the longer he watched the steam rise from it, the less appealing it looked. Sure it warmed him up on the dreary day like today, but he couldn't quite stomach it. Of course it had to be pouring on their anniversary, well the anniversary of the worst day of his life. Roderich called Elizabeta about every two weeks just to check up on her and they still got lunch once a month. She had met a gorgeous, petite, Belgian girl named Emma. She was very sweet and kind. She treated Elizabeta right and He knew Elizabeta loved that Emma was a chocolatier. It was like all Elizabeta's dreams had come true. He still missed her and thought about her often, and now that she moved on it was even worse that he still wanted to be with her. He had slowly accepted his chosen fate that he would end up alone, but some days the loneliness was unbearable. No amount of composing, afternoon tea or the occasional painting could keep his mind off the white-haired male.<p>

His heart would flutter at the mere thought of Gil even if his whole being wanted to be against it. He would get flashes of being with Gil at afternoon tea or Gil sitting on the love seat in his piano room writing something as he played. He wished the images would go away because he didn't want them. He wanted nothing to do with any of it. Roderich finally lifted the cup to his lips breathing in the crisp smell of the coffee that he loved. It came on suddenly like it did the first time and it burned in his throat like heartburn. _Gil was near_, he mind reminded him as the icy panic rushed through his body. _ I don't want to see him! I don't! _His brain yelled, but his pounding heart was giving a different message. Roderich was about to bolt for the door when it opened letting in the man he'd been avoiding. It had been the first time in two years he had this feeling and he just wanted to run. He peaked at Gil from over the top of the booth.

The albino was soaked from the monsoon that raged outside, his clothes were sopping and the whites of his eyes were webbed with red. He wore a three-piece suit that had probably been ruined by the rain and was totally out of place. Gil looked soaked to the very core and Roderich almost felt bad for him. Almost. If he didn't despise the man so much he would have cared. The brunette stared into his mug once again and willed his mind to worry about if Gil had been crying or not. "Can I see your mark, please! I'm desperate here, I know my soulmate is near, I just want to meet him or her." Roderich scoffed at the way he badgered the poor barista. To his surprise the barista obliged and lifted up his shirt. A brilliant rose flushed across Roderich's cheeks and he slumped farther into the booth. Was Gil really going to ask everyone? Ice clung to his heart when he realized he couldn't escape now without Gil noticing him and asking about his mark. The brunette closed his eyes and tried to keep his breathing even as Gil questioned everyone in the shop about their marks. He was surprised that everyone freely accepted his request. Soulmates really did trump everything in their world. "Hi."

Roderich looked up at Gil, as the albino slid into his booth only because it would be rude not to. The soft music played in the background and as it always did, followed along with Gil's sadness and desperation. "Yes, hello."

"You must be him. My soulmate. I've checked everyone else here, show me your mark." He demanded.

"Look Gil, I'm not really interested." Roderich stood abandoning his half drunk cup.

"You know who I am?"

"I was at the beach that day. Right behind you and your friends." He looked down at Gil like he was beneath him and in Roderich's opinion the albino was.

"Why didn't you say anything?"

Roderich let out a short, sarcastic laugh. "I'm not really into guys who only want to sleep around with 'desperate girls who haven't found their match yet'."

"Listen I-"

"Honestly I'd rather be alone. Now if you'll excuse me." Roderich started to walk toward the door, but he was stopped when Gil grabbed his wrist.

"Wait! Please just give me a chance. I'm not that person anymore. I just came from yet another one of my friend's weddings and I don't want to be alone anymore. I want to see if this soulmate thing is for real, don't you?"

Roderich pulled himself away from Gil, _well that would explain his appearance…_ "No." _Yes! I do even if I don't think it will work out with you. There has to be a reason I match you. _He swallowed thickly, pushing his needy thoughts to the back of his mind as he looked upon the utterly broken man that stood before him. He knew what it felt like to be that broken even if he'd never admit it. He remembered that look in Gilbert's eyes the once he once wore when he'd begged Elizabeta to stay, when he desperately wished it wasn't Gilbert who was his soulmate. He tried to stop his heart from going out to Gilbert. He knew what it felt like to be that lonely, and even if he'd decided that he'd end up alone, he was as terrified as Gilbert looked right now.

"Just give me a chance. We can start over. I'm Gilbert Beilschimdt, nice to meet you."

Roderich was hyper aware that everyone in the coffee house was staring at the pair, hanging on their every word like their encounter was a daytime soap opera. He gritted his teeth and sighed, he owed Gilbert a chance didn't he? Maybe, just maybe he judged his soulmate a little too harshly. Maybe one day his emotional reaction to Gilbert would catch up to the physical one. "Okay. I'll give you another chance. My name is Roderich Edelstein. It's definitely interesting to meet you."

"Really?" The albino's scarlet eyes lit up and Roderich tried his hardest to not find this endearing.

"I'm not meaning anything by this, believe me, but let's go back to my place." He put a hand up to stop any sexual quip Gilbert would have uttered. "If you make that joke now, I'll revoke your second chance." Gilbert's smirk dropped and he quickly shut his mouth. "Now," The brunette continued, "you've embarrassed me enough here, let's go." He yanked his hand away and led Gilbert out to his car. He wasn't too happy that about the amount of water that was sure to soak into the clean leather, but he bit his tongue.

Gilbert was a bit surprised when they pulled up to an apartment building and he was led up to a penthouse, but it would explain how they guy dressed. The place was simple but elegant. The room that would have been the third bedroom had been converted into a music room. A glossy ebony piano sat in front of a tall rectangular window that currently bathed room in white moonlight. Gilbert tried not to snoop around too much as he was invited to sit in the living room.

"Can I get you something to drink since we did not get the chance to finish at the coffee shop?"

"Do you have any beer?"

Roderich gave him a look that said, 'do I look like the kind of guy that would have beer?' "No. Coffee, water or tea."

"Coffee is fine, though I should introduce you to some good beer! It's awesome because the awesome me drinks it!"

"You bounced back real quick." Roderich muttered under his breath as he made them both coffees.

"Well of course I do! I'm too awesome to stay down. I'll make you fall for me Roddy! It's fate isn't it? I bet it will happen."

"What if it doesn't? Who is 'fate' to decide what I should do? Maybe I'll make my own path."

"You really don't like being told what to do, do you?" Gilbert mused.

The brunette flushed, "How would you know that?"

"Don't be so defensive, it was just an observation." He tugged at his half-dried clothes that were sticking to him. "Would you mind lending me something dry to wear, by the way?"

Roderich stared at him, appalled, "Are you kidding me? We just met."

"Well I could continue to drip all over your fancy furniture and hardwood floor if you'd like." He smirked, eyes ruby eyes wide and knowing.

The brunette groaned and went to his room to fetch a basic white T-shirt and sweatpants. He threw them at Gilbert, "Bathroom is in the hallway and the piano room you were snooping around in earlier." Roderich swallowed and went back to brewing the coffees as the albino changed. He had to actively keep his mind from thinking about the fact the Gilbert was stripping down mere feet away from where he was. _He is _not _attractive or worth fantasizing about! _He mentally scolded himself. He glanced at Gilbert as he came back into the sitting room and snickered a bit at how ridiculous Gilbert looked in his clothes. The shirt was too tight around his chest and it showed his midriff, while the sweatpants fell to his mid-ankle.

"I'm surprised you have clothes like this, Roddy."

"What did you do with the wet clothes?" He ignored the quip and the nickname.

Gilbert held up a plastic bag. "I found a bag under the sink in the bathroom."

"Making ourselves quite at home, are we?" He muttered, not even trying to keep the disgust out his tone.

"Yep, who knows, maybe I'll be living here eventually." He winked as he settled down on the couch.

_As if that will happen. _Roderich scoffed and brought the coffees over. "So, what do you do for a living?"

"I'm a general manager for a couple of steakhouses. I'm so awesome they wanted me to manage several restaurants." He grinned in the pompous way of his that complete annoyed Roderich, but the brunette was surprised he as a decent career. "What do you do?"

"I am a piano player with a local orchestra and I also do some freelance on the side for movie soundtracks."

The albino cackled a bit, "That does seem to fit you, a prissy orchestra player. Did you come from some old money rich family too?" He smirked.

Roderich swallowed thickly trying to keep his flashbacks at bay. "Yes I did."

This made Gilbert laugh even more. "I bet they'd be horrified that their prissy son has a male soulmate."

"Are you trying to make me hate you even more?" The brunette responded, changing the subject and took a sip of his coffee.

"Well you already do, don't you? So what do I have to lose? I might as well show you who I am now. We're soulmates after all we're supposed to work out forever."

"And what if I refuse?"

"You'll come around eventually, many people have succumbed to my awesomeness. That or 'Lady Fate' will step in and it will work out anyway, or so they tell us." He paused to sip at the coffee. "Plus you've already made one mistake."

Roderich rolled his eyes, "I know, I'm starting to see where I've gone wrong in giving you a chance."

"No, not that. You've shown where you live. Nothing is stopping me from coming around to annoy whenever I want."

"I could always not let you in."

"I'd have my ways of getting in."

"I live in a penthouse, good luck with that."

"I have my ways. I could always get a key from your doorman; soulmates trump almost everything in our society, after all."

"I could get a restraining order against you."

"Against your soulmate? Good luck with that." He ran a hand through his hand hair, violet eyes following the muscles of Gilbert's bicep as they flexed slightly with his movements.

"Could you be anymore obvious?"

"What are you talking about?"

"I get checked out a lot, I can tell when someone is giving me eyes. You think I'm attractive, although I'm not surprised, admit it."

"It's not my fault! I'm not trying to check you out. It's like ever since we were at the beach, I can't stop thinking about you. Trust me, I don't want to. You're hardly my type. I mean we're complete opposites and I still find your personality despicable."

"Wow, Specs, lay it all out on the table, will ya? There is a plus in all this, at least you find me physically attractive so that's a start."

He groaned inwardly and sighed, "Well fine, we'll at least start with trying to be friends."

"Did I just get friend-zoned by my own soulmate? Ouch." He snickered, sarcasm dripping from his words. "Nah, I'm not worried. I'll make you fall for me. I'm pretty persistent and I think I like you already."

"You like me? We hardly know each other and I haven't treated you well at all."

"Maybe I'm the type to like what I can't have."

"So what happens if you can have me?"

He raised his eyebrows, "See you think it's a possibility! I'll take that. Plus I still think I'd like ya. More what I meant is I like a challenge and someone who plays hard to get turns me on."

"I'm not playing anything. I'm just not fond of you."

"For now. You know you're as curious about this soulmate thing as I am. You'll give a shot. Plus I've changed in the two years we've been apart. I'll show you the man I can be and what a perfect soulmate I'll be."

Roderich was about answer as lightning cracked against the sky, lighting up the dark sky with white streaks. He tried not to look affected by the sudden light or the thundering sound that followed. A fake yawn came over him and he checked his watched. "Well it's getting late. You should go."

"It's barely 10. Although, staying up late doesn't really fit your personality." Gilbert finished the rest of his coffee and laid his business card on the table. "Call me if you want or I may just show up."

He rolled his eyes as he walked the albino to the door. "I wouldn't put it past you. You do seem like the unexpected guest who will come just annoy me."

"Not long until you won't find it so annoying."

"Get out of here already."

"Geez. Fine, have your precious 10:00 bed time." He waved over his shoulder as he walked off. Roderich shut the door as Gilbert's form retreated around the corner. He strode into the music room, watching as the lightning stretched across the dark clouds. He winced as the thunder erupted after each light show, hugging himself to try to stop the trembles. It had been had been 9 years since then; he knew he should have been over this by now, but that didn't stop the tightness in his throat or his shaky breaths. He was glad he got Gilbert out in time, now was not the time for the overconfident idiot to find out about his stupid fears. He could almost hear the albino's cackle, mocking him, calling him a child. He was 27 after all he shouldn't feel this way. He squeezed his eyes shut praying the memories wouldn't resurface this time.

Roderich did all he could to conquer the fear, he rented an apartment on the top floor with wide windows something he swore he'd never do, but he thought it would help. As much as he tried to watch the storm, telling himself it wouldn't escalate, not like that, he'd moved from that area. Those storms didn't happen here like they did there. He knew he'd retreat into his bed with blankets over his head and noise canceling headphones like he always did, begging his dreams to stay away from that fateful night. He even tried to think of Gilbert this time, but the images replayed in slow motion as they always did. The brunette almost wished that someone was here to hold him, and not Elizabeta this time, but dare he think it? Gilbert.

* * *

><p><em><strong>AN: I am not dead! I have finally written something new. This has been in the works for sometime and I don't how long this will take. I am attempting to write a longer slow build, multi-chapter. Pruaus soulmates I know it isn't a popular pairing, but I love it so damn much. Leave a review if you wanna. cross-uploaded on AO3 **_


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